As you read this I’m embarking on an exciting journey… I’m returning to the workforce. Today is my first day at my new day job.
After years of staying at home with my children, volunteering at school or helping out with a field trip at the drop of a dime, and writing, always writing, today I’m returning to the land of the gainfully employed. It was a tough decision but one that’s been in the works for a long time. Now that my oldest is driving, my youngest is in high school and all those fun college bills are a heartbeat away—it seemed like the right time.
I kind of remember what it was like to collect a steady paycheck and receive a W-2 at the end of the year, but it’s been awhile, and I’ll be honest, I’m a little terrified. I’m not sure if that is fear for myself, or for the unsuspecting folks I’ll be working with. After all, these are relatively normal straight-laced business suit wearing people who probably don’t have strangers stopping mid-chew to stare when they realize you and your lunch date are casually discussing how to kill someone and dispose of the body over enchiladas. And yes, I have had this happen. Hahahahaha… you should have seen the looks we got.
I know it’s overly optimistic, but my goal is to get through the first week without doing anything too embarrassing. I wore slacks today so I think I’m safe from the old tucking your dress into the back of your pantyhose thing, but who knows if I’ll make it through the day without referring to any fictional characters as if they were real people. I just hope I can hide my fictional addiction long enough for my colleagues to get to know me… then maybe they won’t feel the need to whip out a straight jacket when some of my more creative personality traits surface. 🙂
If you have any suggestions as to how I can blend in to the workplace with normal, non-writerly type people this week please share. I’m looking for all the help I can get!
20 thoughts on “Back to Work”
Dana, this is so very exciting! Good luck today! You will be fabulous! Lol to the murder over enchiladas story. This hasn’t happened to me…yet. Maybe don’t bring up body disposing methods on the first day and you’ll be fine. 🙂
Hah! Yes, no body disposing methods on the first day – shoot, I’m a little conservative so I might even suggest for the first week. Then its all good! Happy for you!
Congrats and best of luck (but I think you’ve got this one nailed, missy)! And hope to visit you soon!
Ghange is cood. Wait. … Ihange Cs good. Wait. … Change is good. Whew. Once the coffee kicks in, you’ll have a great day in the office. 🙂
Congrats, Dana-Mermaid!!! You’ll be fabulous. Actually, I find that I get more writing done when I’m at work. It just makes me focus my energy on time management so I get writing in during lunch breaks and after work. As for blending in – just be yourself.
I work contract and I use a 2-way NDA – so they can’t claim anything I write as theirs. If you write on their computer – it’s gets weird. That includes email from a browser (write in the body of the email message and send it to yourself at home. They can actually track that. They also like to control websites you can visit – they actually blocked me from my own site! I had them remove the block. I am doing the revers. At the end of this week I will not be employed after 50 years of being in the workplace. Let’s see how long that lasts!
You will be great! Don’t worry about doing anything weird. Here are some things I’ve witnessed in my long tenure in the workforce. As long as you don’t do any of these, you will be fine.
1. Sleeping on a table. Every day between the hours of 11-3. Said table wasn’t in an office, but in an open room.
2. Doing yoga in the middle of the hallway.
3. Belly dancing at a staff meeting.
4. Wrapping someone’s entire office in foil.. including chairs, every pencil, the floor, computer, etc..
5. Collecting smurf dolls and displaying them (I don’t mean 10. I mean 300).
6. Stealing someone’s lunch, eating half of it and putting the rest back in the fridge with a note saying you didn’t like it.
Remember, they are more afraid of you than you are of them. Although on second thought, thinking back to some of my former co-workers, you may need to be afraid of them too.. 🙂
LMAO…I just know you’ve witnessed all of the activities on your list, and that cracks me up even more…crazy world (and number 6? just OMG)!
W-O-W! That is freaking hilarious Masha!
I’m looking to return to the land of payroll taxes too. Not much luck on that front. Best of luck with your new job!
Good luck today! Don’t get caught discussing poisoning over tacos either. Or the appropriate weapon to use if a fictional character decides to go postal at the office. Lol.
You are woman, hear you roar! 🙂 You will be amazing in the work force.
Thanks for all the support! My first day wasn’t so bad, I met some really nice people and I didn’t even see any belly dancing or yoga in the hallways! 😉
I’m so proud of you, Dana-mermaid! One day down, and just a few more until your first paycheck! Congratulates again!
Or congratulations. Whatever. Glad you survived!
Don’t forget, you have a loving husband and two beautiful children cheering for you and available to help. We also can hide bodies 😉
We love you and are very proud of your courage re-entering the workforce.
I’ll have my kilt on when you get home.
Thank you Andy! I love you baby!
Wow. A kilt? Dana is a lucky wife. 🙂
Yes, a kilt. REALLY! My hubby wears it when he mows the lawn or when we go to a Scottish Festival. 😉
Love you Dana. Hugs!!!!!
I love you too Carlene! I love each and every one of you!!!
Comments are closed.