Category Archives: mermaids

A Night of Southern Comfort – an exclusive, sizzling excerpt

mermaids, ,

Hi!  My debut release, A NIGHT OF SOUTHERN COMFORT, was released on June 15th and so far it has been a roller coaster! A fun roller coaster.

I want to thank all of you who bought the book, left a review or sent a message to me about how much yo enjoyed AN0SC – it means so much.  Reviews have been amazing – 27 5-star reviews! WOOT!

So, since my brain is too fried to think up an original post, I’ve decided to post an exclusive excerpt here at the the Lagoon!  Enjoy! Robin

Pink tinged her cheeks as she shook her head and looked down at the tabletop. Her hands gripped the edge with white-knuckle tension. He guessed she struggled with whether she should stay here in Elliott. She was too smart not to have a backup plan. The fact that she needed one pissed him off. He’d been on edge since the meeting with the governor in Richmond and now he was wound so tight he either had to fight or fuck the anger out of his system before he blew.

Jack moved in his seat and jostled the table, causing Kayla to look at him.The jolt of cellular recognition crackled between them like a live wire. He’d read about it—that crazy moment when your body remembers where it has been, whom it connected with, and yearns to be there again. Frankly, he was surprised that the Formica covered table hadn’t gone up in flames.

“I guess this is a pretty crazy coincidence.” With a shaking hand, Kayla smoothed her hair back from her forehead.

“I don’t believe in coincidence.”

A furrow creased her brow. “What? How can you say that? The bar? My father’s house? This town?”

Jack leaned forward and placed his hand on the table, only a hair’s breadth from where hers lay. It took everything he had to resist closing that gap. “Doc, you went to the bar looking for a man and I happened to be in the right place at the very right time. That’s not kismet—that’s just probabilities.”

“No.” Her voice was a hoarse whisper that curled around his gut in a tight clench. “I wasn’t looking for a man at all. That changed when I saw you. I picked you because I couldn’t not pick you.”

At her words, his entire focus shifted to include only her. Kayla’s expression was defiant, daring him to refute what she’d said. He couldn’t. He couldn’t even speak, much less argue. Frankly, he didn’t know if he wanted to. The thought that someone like Kayla might actually want him scared the hell out of him.

His mom approached the table and “tsked” at the untouched pie on his plate. “Y’all want anything else?”

Never breaking eye contact with Kayla, Jack closed the distance necessary to cover her long, delicate fingers with his own.

“Dr. Roarke will take the pie.” He briefly calculated just how dumb his idea was, but with all of his blood flowing to his crotch, he couldn’t count that high. “To go.”

Blurb:
One night of passion…
Detective Jackson Cantrell never imagined that one night with an irresistible stranger would turn his life upside down. He’s spent years living in the shadows, but Dr. Michaela Roarke awakened a passion inside him he’d buried years ago.
He never expected the woman would turn out to be the governor’s daughter…and his next assignment. The governor blackmails Jackson to secretly watch over Michaela and protect her from a stalker, or kiss his dream job at the FBI good-bye. Swearing to keep things strictly professional, Jackson moves in with Michaela. Too bad his heart can’t keep the same promise.
But when the stalker’s attacks quickly escalate beyond mere photographs to bodily harm, Jackson must race to save Michaela’s life. And he’ll have to figure out how to keep her once she discovers his lie.

When a Pantser Plots a Road Trip…

Kimberly MacCarron, mermaids, Writing,

What Happens When  a Pantser Plots a Roadtrip?

I’ll answer that in three-and-a-half words.  It ain’t pretty.

I don’t know if it goes against my very nature, but planning a cross-country road trip with my five kids makes me a tad bit nervous.  And anxious.  And really, really, REALLY scared.  It’s not so much the perpetual questions and the fighting in the backseat because I’m pretty much resigned to that.  It’s the mystery.  I hate taking the mystery out of my trip, which probably makes me a pantser in every aspect of my life.

I went to Ireland with my friend Ellen when we were in our early twenties.  We planned our route carefully.  One week to get from Shannon, Ireland to Dublin.  Then we would catch the ship to England and spend two weeks touring England and Scotland.  We had it all mapped out.  We knew where we would be staying.   We planned on hitting every tourist trap from one coast to the other.

And then we decided to scrap the rest of the trip and we stayed in Ireland for the whole month, not knowing where we would sleep at the end of every night.  She was nervous.  I was beyond-the-moon excited!  The mystery!  The possibilities!  Just winging it!  Ahhhh.  It was heaven for me.  Hell for her.

That trip was one of my favorites.  Once we met a nice woman who gave us directions out of Dublin, and we ended up staying at her house for a couple of days.  She set us up with two cute single locals who took us out on the town.  You just don’t get that with careful planning.  Don’t even get me started on tour packages…

So, during this extremely stressful plotting of my current trip, I’ve come to realize a few things that will also help my writing.  It’s not such a bad thing to have a basic idea of where you’re headed.  It’s not such a bad thing to know where you’ll sleep each night.  It’s the journey along the way that it is the mystery. Who knows when we’ll drive by the biggest ball of twine?  Who knows when we’ll meet a family who will somehow affect our lives along the way?  Or meet somebody who will have a fabulous story to tell?

I’ve decided to let my characters learn a bit from my lesson in planning.  It’s okay to have a destination and stops along the way.  It doesn’t mean that everything is planned.  The substance and personality of the characters is what, to me, means the most.  I just have to plan a bit, and I can plop those characters down into a mess I’ve created or just a beautiful part of our country that he/she has never visited before.  It’s okay to plan a bit.  It is.

If it sounds like I’m still struggling, I am.  But, it’s a struggle that I believe will help me in the long run.  Just like I realize that winging it may very well be in my personality but it doesn’t fit with taking five kids on a road trip without some planning, I’ve learned that writing can be looked at the same way.

This pantser needs to go finish the basic outline of a loosely planned road trip.  I will know where my five children sleep the first few nights.  And I know what day I’ll hit Albuquerque because my Golden Heart finalist friend Tammy is planning to house us for a couple of nights.  Shhhh.  If anyone knows her, pleased don’t tell her that my children are hellions.

And now I leave you with a question.  If you’re a pantser or plotter in your writing life, does that flow into other aspects of your life?  And how do you stop that from happening? Or do you want to?

Enjoy a Little Southern Comfort with Debut Author Robin Covington

mermaids,

Have you ever wondered what happens when two Waterworld Mermaids chat on Facebook? No? Oh come on, like you have a life. Wait, that’s just me without one? *slink swims away*

Ha. Like you could get rid of me that easily. 🙂

I have our own Robin Covington cornered under the waterfall. Her debut novel, A Night of Southern Comfort, came out June 15. Yay! If you haven’t bought it yet, you really should. The book is awesome! Recently, Robin and I chatted about A Night of Southern Comfort via Facebook and it went like this:

Avery FlynnAvery Flynn

Hey hot stuff you out there?

Robin CovingtonRobin Covington

Hey! I’m here. beer in hand.

Avery Flynn

Oh what kind are you drinking?

Robin Covington

Coors Light! We were out of Rolling Rock and Stella

Avery Flynn

That is a crap beer. I’m ashamed you even have it in your house. For your book release I’m buying you some real beer.

Robin Covington

I know . . . I know. I usually have Stella. poor me

Avery Flynn

OK, let’s talk about your book. I love the opening scene in the bar. Did that come to you full grown or did you have to write into it?

Robin Covington

I thought of the whole scene from beginning to end once I thought of the first line about her losing her Junior League membership if they knew what she was doing in that bar. I heard that and then I knew she’d go through with it.

Avery Flynn

Ha. Love it. I’m so excited to talk about your book that I jumped the gun. Give us the blurb and a bit of background about your characters.

Robin Covington

Okay. A Night of Southern Comfort is about two people, Michaela and Jackson, who give themselves one night to get what they really want instead of settling for what they think they can have. When fate throws them together again they have the chance to have the life they really want – if they can get beyond Jackson’s deception.
Jackson is a former Marine and Undercover FBI agent that is back in his little Southern hometown – where he never wanted to be. Michaela is the daughter of a rising politician and she is sick of living in a fishbolw so she goes to Elliott, VA to have a normal life.

Avery Flynn

If you had to pick one moment from A Night of Southern Comfort that stands out as one of your favorites, what would you say it is?

Robin Covington

Oh man! That’s like asking a mam to pick their favorite kid!

Avery Flynn

Suck it up. 

Robin Covington

I think it would have to be when Michaela wakes Jackson from his nightmare and they make love for the first knowing who their real identities.

Avery Flynn

Awwwwww, that was a really awesome scene. OK, were going to finish off with some Family Feud style quirky questions.
  • Thong or Panties?
  • One food you’d eat every day for a year if you could?
  • Top three men on your island?
  • Favorite guilty pleasure?
  • Number one thing you need for a cross country road trip?

Robin Covington

  • Thong
  • Haribo gummi bers
  • Joe Mangianello, Alex O’Loughlin and Christopher Gorham
  • Guilty pleasure: Sunbathing nude
  • My iPod!

Avery Flynn

Mmmmm gummi bears. Remind me to send you the gummi bears You Tube song. You’ll never get it out of your head. Thanks so much for doing this Robin. Give us the deets on your release dates and tell the fine folks where they can read an excerpt.

Robin Covington

It was my pleasure! The book will be out on June 15th (excerpt is TBD at this point!)

Avery Flynn

Well then I’ll end with a big naner naner boo boo because I’ve gotten to read the whole thing and it’s AWESOME! Have a great night Robin – even with that God awful beer. 

Robin Covington

Thanks! At least it wasn’t a Zima!
Check out the rest of our conversation on my Avery Flynn blog and enjoy some tunes that helped inspire A Night of Southern Comfort.

Driven To Distraction

Dana Rodgers, mermaids, Motivation, Writing

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. It was summer break…

Does it ever seem like the sun, the moon and the stars are aligned against you? Like life goes out of its way to throw obstacles in your path? That your family just doesn’t equate writing with working? Well, it sure as heck does at my house! Especially in the summer when my kids are home from school.

I swear some days it feels like no one wants to talk to me until I sit down at the computer. Then, of course, the phone rings, someone comes to the door, the dog is barking and the kids are peppering me with questions—all at the same time!

A typical day in my house involves my youngest daughter walking into the room and breaking down, in minuet detail, how some computer game about dragons’ works. I’m sure this is very important in her twelve year old brain, but for me… well, not so much. Especially when I’m trying to get words on the page.

Then the phone rings… My brain is now torn between the phone call, the scene I was writing and my daughter who is not taking the hint and still rambling on about the skill points you get for capturing a rainbow dragon.

Giving up on writing for the moment, I tell my friend to hang on, save my WIP, close my computer and quietly explain to my daughter that I would love to hear all about rainbow dragons, later, preferably when I’m not writing. I leave the room and walk outside to soak up some sunshine and have a relaxing conversation catching up with my friend. Until my older daughter comes along asking me about whether or not she can meet up with her friends later. Younger daughter then arrives to ask about a snack. I resolve their issues and send them away so I can talk in peace… which works for about five minutes until the UPS man shows up. Did I mention my dog despises the UPS man and always tries to eat him? Usually wagging so hard her entire body is moving side to side, but she still sounds like a vicious killer and the UPS man is terrified of her. So I tell my friend I’ll call her back, lock up the killer dog and sign for the package. I go inside and ask my kids if they need anything else… Snacks? Questions? Permission to run with scissors or perhaps jump off a bridge?

I then go back outside, redial my friend and about ninety-seven seconds into the conversation my youngest child comes bounding outside and says, “If we won the lottery could I have a horse?”

Yeah, that wasn’t random at all… but it is the story of my life. So anyone out there who is under the delusion that a writer’s life is glamorous. Think again. Most days involve spouses, kids, day-to-day life, and those pesky day jobs. However, on occasion something happens that surprises me.

Allow me to set the stage for you… It’s last Wednesday afternoon, and my children have been finished with school for approximately five minutes, when I hear the chant of summer for the first time, “Mom, we’re bored!”

Me: “Girls, mom’s working. Please go find something to entertain yourselves. I promise we’ll go do something fun as soon as I finish this scene.”

I return to the computer and just as I get into the groove and the scene really starts to flow, I hear screaming as my children run through the house. So, like any other parent with any sense, I’m thinking this can’t be good.

Me: “Girls, what are you doing?”

Them: “We’re making a movie.”

Me: “Okay, just don’t destroy anything or kill each other.”

I should have known I was in trouble as soon as I heard the maniacal laughter. But instead, I choose to enjoy the relative peace and quiet while I could get it, and continued working. About half an hour later my kids come in and drag me downstairs to see their horror movie trailer. I couldn’t believe MY children had put something this incredible together. And done so in less than an hour… Enjoy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_IjE_KQlEf8

Hey There Darynda!

Interview, Kimberly MacCarron, mermaids, ,

I’m honored to welcome the fabulous Darynda Jones to the lagoon today.

I’m ashamed to say I didn’t listen when I was told I just had to read FIRST GRAVE ON THE RIGHT.  But I’m glad to say that when I did, I could immediately buy SECOND GRAVE ON THE LEFT.  For the first time in my life, I paid full price for a hardback book.  It was worth every penny.   Many times over…

Then I—along with all of Darynda’s other fans—had to sit and (im)patiently wait until THIRD GRAVE DEAD AHEAD came out.

I’ve stalked her on Twitter.  I’ve visited her website so many times for updates on her books that I’m sure to get banned from there soon.

Imagine my surprise when she so generously agreed to be interviewed by me—with nary a restraining order in sight.

In 2009, Darynda’s unpublished manuscript (FIRST GRAVE ON THE RIGHT) won RWA’s Golden Heart award for Best Paranormal Romance.  Less than three years later, Darynda is a double RITA nominee in two categories (Best First Book; and Best Novel with Strong Romantic Elements) for that same book, only it’s now not only published but a bestseller.

Let’s ask Darynda a few questions, and maybe she’ll even answer a few more…

1.    What was your inspiration for FIRST GRAVE ON THE RIGHT?

My inspiration was actually my heroine Charley herself. She just kind of popped into my head one morning, told me all about her life, and the rest is history. It was her personality that drew me to her more than anything, though. I wanted a character who was fun and a tad crazy but who lived in a rather dark world. I wanted her to have accepted her circumstances, to treat them rather everyday, like they were nothing special, and not be a whiner about them. LOL

2.    How many books do you anticipate there being in the series?

Well, my editor wants it to be ongoing, so there’s just no telling. I would love it to continue for quite a while longer. I adore writing about Charley and her antics.

3.    Please, please, PLEASE tell us that Charley and Reyes finally get together in the flesh.  I know that’s not a question.  So just comment.  And comment to my liking.  🙂

Hahaha. They definitely do, and quite soon. *wink wink*

4.    In real life, are you more like Charley or her best friend Cookie? 

You know, I’m not sure I’m very much like Cookie. She is super savvy, efficient, a tireless worker . . . yeah, that’s not me. I am like Charley in one very basic element: We both suffer from serious cases of ADD.

5.    Do you have a Cookie in your life?  I think everyone should have one. 

Oh, don’t I wish! I agree. Everyone should have a Cookie. And if I ever find one, I’m going to kidnap her and force her to do research and go to the post office for me.

6.    How many hours a day do you write?

It kind of depends on where I’m at in the process and how tight of a schedule I’m on. If I’m on a first draft, I will usually write (actually put new words on paper) anywhere from 2-10 hours a day, although I will be at my computer for more like 14. There is SO much more to writing than writing. If I am nearing my deadline, my hours will jump up from there.

7.    Do you have something special you do as a reward for reaching a goal?   (Finishing a book.  Finishing a tough chapter…)

Well, I am all about the reward system. LOL. After I finish a deadline, I will take a couple of days off (schedule permitting) and just vegetate. My brain is usually quite mushy by then anyway. Finishing a tough chapter? I will probably take the evening off and watch an episode of my favorite television show or go to a movie.

8.    There is a rumor going around that FIRST GRAVE may become a television series.  Can you tell us a bit about that?  And if it happens, how in the world will anybody be good enough to play either Charley or Reyes?? 

Yep! It actually sold to CBS for the CW a couple of years ago. Hopefully they’ll do something with it someday, though I’m not holding my breath. I can see several women playing Charley. For some reason, that is not nearly as much of a challenge as finding someone to play Reyes. I do not envy the casting director that job.

9.    I’ve heard you mention your sons, who you call the Mighty, Mighty Jones Boys.  How old are they?  Have they read your books?  And if so, are they proud, embarrassed (by the hot scenes) or a little bit of both?

My boys are awesome even though my youngest wrecked my car yesterday. LOL. They are 23 and (as of today) 19.

My oldest is Deaf and is not a fan of the English language, so he has a great excuse, but neither has read my books. It doesn’t bother me in the least. My husband doesn’t read my books either. I have no problem with that at all. However, many of their friends, especially girls, do read them and that gets funny. One girl texted my youngest and commented on how hot they were. My son texted me with: “MOM! What exactly are you writing???”

It’s the little things in life.

10. What author living or dead would you want to meet and why?

Well, since I’ve met the amazing JR Ward and the incredible Neil Gaiman, I guess I would love to meet Stephen King. I’d also love to meet Jane Austen and Oscar Wilde. Oh, and Mary Shelley. How cool would that be? And I’d love to have a face-to-face with Suzanne Collins. And Stephen Hunter! Okay, you said ‘author.’ Sorry. They’re like Lay’s Potato Chips, you can’t pick just one.

11. What books have you read recently?  Any book recommendations for those waiting patiently for FOURTH GRAVE BENEATH MY FEET?

Well, anything by JR Ward should do the trick! LOL. That woman is amazing. Also, Molly Harper and Jacquelyn Frank. Fantastic books!

12. What time of the day do you find most productive for writing?

A quarter past deadline. 🙂

13. How did you come up with your character names?

Actually Charley Davidson was originally named Harley Davidson. My editor put a stop to that silliness, so Charley was born.

As for Reyes, I was writing First Grave while interpreting at our local Jr. High and there was a kid whose first name was Reyes. I’d never heard it as a first name before and just fell in love. So I told him I was stealing it. He seemed okay with my thievery.

Oddly enough, at that very same school, there was another kid named Garrett who was sitting a couple of desks away from me while I was trying to come up with a name for, you guessed it, Garrett. Weird. And Swopes is the last name of one of my best friends.

I had a friend named Cookie who lived in Albuquerque many years ago and stole her name for my loyal, fashion-challenged administrative assistant.

Uncle Bob is in homage to the Terminator where John Connor introduces the Terminator to his friends as Uncle Bob. I thought that was too funny.

14. You have a YA series debuting in October.  Can you tell us a little bit about that?  How many books do you think will be in the series?

Absolutely! The Darklight series will be a trilogy. Here is a quick blurb:

Ten years ago, Lorelei’s parents disappeared without a trace.  Raised by her grandparents and leaning on the support of her best friends, Lorelei is finally beginning to accept the fact that her parents are never coming home.  For Lorelei, life goes on.

 High school is not quite as painful as she thinks it will be, and things are as normal as they can be.  Until the day the school’s designated loner, Cameron Lusk, begins to stalk her, turning up where she least expects it, standing outside her house in the dark, night after night.  Things get even more complicated when a new guy—terrifying, tough, sexy Jared Kovach—comes to school.  Cameron and Jared instantly despise each other and Lorelei seems to be the reason for their animosity.  What does Jared know about her parents?  Why does Cameron tell Jared he can’t have Lorelei?  And what will any of them do when Death comes knocking for real? 

15. Do you listen to music when you write?  Do you come up with a playlist for your books and characters? 

I don’t listen to music while I write at all. I must have complete silence. There is enough chaos in my head while I write. Music only adds to the confusion.

16.  How do you balance your web presence (blogging, web site, interview) with your writing?

Badly. It’s really hard to come up with that balance and it’s a constant challenge for me. I will often spend more time on writing-related content than actual writing, and that is not how it should be. I’m considering therapy.

17. Do you believe in an afterlife?  Supernatural? 

I do believe in the afterlife, I’m just not sure how much of it I believe is here on Earth. I am quite the skeptic.

18. Plotter or pantser?

Plotter. I MUST know where my story is going or I get lost in all that confusion I mentioned earlier and it’s hard to come back from that. Pantsers amaze me. They are like these mystical creatures who are not really of this world. I think they’re from Saturn. Or one of its rings.

19. Tea or Coffee? 

Coffee. Sigh….

20. Do you snack when you write?  If so, what are some of your favorites?

Gah! I’m so boring. No, I don’t snack. It’s too distracting. LOL.

 

One lucky commenter will get his/her choice of either of Darynda’s October 2012 releases:  FOURTH GRAVE BENEATH MY FEET; or DEATH AND THE GIRL NEXT DOOR–the first in her YA series.   And making it even better…Darynda will personally sign it!  The winner will be randomly chosen and posted on Sunday.

I’m sure I’m not alone when I wish Darynda the very best of luck in Anaheim at RWA’s RITA Awards in July.  Thank you, Darynda, for swimming with your mermaid fans!   And those on dry land.

Standing Out in the Crowd

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Back in March of this year, I read Author Kelly L. Stone’s post featuring Dianna Love , who is wonderful about helping her fellow writers, and she posed the question:

What makes your writing stand out?

It’s something you need to think about and as I sat there trying to come up with an answer, I realized that while in my heart I know my story is special (and so is yours, trust me), it was far more difficult to put that into words.  Imagine that, a writer at a loss for words!  The interesting thing was that Dianna had posted a question to her fans on her Facebook page in preparation for the blog post asking what they thought made a story different.  Being a huge fan of her work, I threw out my two cents and she used it in the post.  Why was it so easy for me to say, “One of the things that makes a story stand out for me is what characters say to each other” to Dianna in reference to what I think makes hers and other authors’ books I love stand out, but then sit in my chair and feel so blank when it came to my own writing?

I think it’s because when I hear that question, I immediately assume the answer should revolve around the plot.  Well, for me, it’s not likely going to be my external plot, but rather my characters and what they say to and do with each other.  It’s why the story about a rock group I read last year was probably pretty basic but I still remember verbatim a line from a trip the band took to the grocery store with the heroine.  Here’s to hoping my future readers appreciate that part of a story as much as I do because it’s what I’m going to be sharing with them.  The things we say to each other.

Readers-what do you remember about a story, even a year after you’ve read it?

Writers-what do you love about your stories? psst-this is what makes them stand out 😉

Me and BEA

mermaids

June 5 and 6 – Jacob Javits Center, NY

Spoiler alert: Throwing yourself into the Book Expo America trade show is a lot like throwing yourself into a mosh pit.  Maybe you’ll come out better for the experience.  Hope!  Hope hard!

Understand first that Jacob Javitz, in Manhattan, is a mammoth exhibition hall.  It’s not meant for the faint of heart.  But I’d brought my bar-code admission ticket, the lines were manageable after rush hour, and I received my ID and lanyard in record time. 

I didn’t attend the entire four day conference. I didn’t get to see any of the special events, or break-out sessions or panel discussions. I just trolled aisle after aisle of publisher displays, marveled at the number of books being promoted, signed, or simply piled up for the taking.  Stood in line at Harlequin, Wiley, Penguin, Simon & Schuster, RWA and smaller publishers like the lovely Shadow Mountain Publishing booth and Ellora’s Cave.  I got bling: a vampire first-aid kit for EC, a whoopee cushion for James Patterson’s new middle-school series, and more tote bags than I need (but who’s complaining?).  Oh, and also the Ellora’s Cave 2012 calendar, autographed by the ManWars-worthy studs, uhm, models (like, are those biceps real? Really?).  After the intense experience that is BEA, I would say: 1) the publishing industry is alive and well, 2) publishers are adjusting as quickly as they can to the digital content revolution,  3) it’s still all about the fun of reading, and 4) don’t sit on a chair in a publisher’s booth without getting permission (practice your “pity-me” smile).

One of the best experiences was my chat with Robert Barrett, co-founder of Autography (http://www.autography.com/).  This platform allows an author to digitally sign an e-book.  Whether at an in-person event or remotely, the author can personalize their e-book for the reader.  He showed up later on at a book signing, offering a the book as a digital download free, with a photo of the author as well as her autograph.  Autography can also work as a publisher platform (but really, take a look at the website, it’s very “next hot app” stuff).

More fun were the enhanced barcodes (which I haven’t figured out yet) on books like The Book of Burger by Rachel Ray.  They promise enhanced digital content.  One of the YA books being promoted offered geographical and historical backstory to the main content.  If I could remember the title, I’d point you to it (are you getting now just how busy those two days were?).  Also, the bling!  Don’t forget the bling.

What’s not fun?  Standing in line for a hot title or celebrity author and finding they’re signing postcards.  Or excerpts.  Honest.   More than once, I saw more the line melt when the signing started and word got passed down.  Sweetheart, there are better books available than what you’re offering right now.  Yes, I know there are possible explanations, but it stings.  It really does.

Using two days out of four, one day was given to writer-centric pursuits, and the other to reading, reading and more reading.  Which is why going a second day, and with a friend, changes a person from a well-behaved professional into a raving lunatic fan: 

I’ll be posting book reviews of my faves in a later post.

If you have the chance to go to BEA, make sure your shoes are sturdy, cards are in your back pocket, your phone is set on stun and your wallet crammed with cash.  Next year, I want a third day, to explore the advances in digital publishing.  Especially since almost everything that was seen this year will be “old” in twelve months.

 

Lessons from the Playground

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Recently, when I went to pick up my children from school, my five-year-old daughter burst out of the classroom, leaped into my arms, and buried her face in my neck. When I asked her what was wrong, she said her best friend had told her, “I don’t like you anymore.”

Wow. It’s hard enough to hear this kind of sentiment as an adult. But for a sensitive five-year-old who has never experienced rejection? Devastating.

I’m happy to say it all blew over. After a little investigation and instruction from the moms, apologies were said, the girls hugged, and now they’re friends again.

Afterwards, my daughter and I came home and had a long talk. About friendships and strategies and coping mechanisms. And what struck me the most about this conversation was how wise I sounded. How, coming from an adult perspective, I could so clearly see the “right” solution to my child’s problems.

At the same time, I recognized I was being something of a hypocrite. Because, you see, the lessons I was trying to teach my daughter are the very ones with which I’ve been struggling.

Here are some of the things my daughter and I discussed:

1. You shouldn’t want to play with someone who doesn’t want to play with you.

So simple, right? So true. But if that’s the case, then why does rejection hurt so much? Whether it’s by an agent or an editor, a loved interest or a friend, rejection sucks. Big time. But it shouldn’t. Instead, we should just see the pass as information gained and move on with our lives.

For example, writers look for a literary agent in order to find an effective advocate for their work. If an agent does not love your work, then he/she, by definition, will not be an effective advocate. So you shouldn’t want to work with an agent who doesn’t want to work with you. Right? So simple. So true. And so much easier said than done.

2. If someone is mean to you, walk away.

It is so easy to get caught up in other people’s drama. To get drawn into an argument, to retaliate to their hurtful behavior. When the truth is, it is so much simpler to step away and focus on your own work, your own interests, your own family. I may have given this advice to my daughter as if it were truth, but it is something which I constantly have to remind myself.

3. If you want to have a friend, then you have to act like a friend.

I think we all learned this friendship adage a long time ago. I know I did. And yet, I am still learning the corollary: If you want to be a writer, then you have to act like a writer. That means, working on my manuscript, whether or not the muse strikes. It means being willing to do the hard stuff, the parts I may not particularly enjoy but that need to get done. It means getting up to write another day, no matter what blows have been dealt the day before.

4. Just because your friend wants to play with somebody else doesn’t mean she likes you any less.

This, perhaps, was the hardest truth for my daughter to swallow. In her mind, preference for another friend automatically equals rejection of her. As adults, we know better. Or do we? If the writing corollary were true (someone else’s success has no bearing on our own), then why, in the midst of our sincere excitement, do we feel that tiny twinge of, well, rejection when we hear another person’s good news? I honestly don’t know.

Maybe it’s human nature. Maybe it’s because our hearts and heads don’t always align. Or maybe these lessons from the playground are just ones that we continue to learn, every single day.

What do you think? What lessons do you continue to learn as an adult? Why is it so hard for our heart to follow what our minds know to be “true”? What is harder– dealing with friendship drama as a child, or having your dreams rejected as an adult?

The “Ouch” Factor

mermaids
Since I seem to be stymied in a flagrant writer’s block, AND I’ve been pondering the topic of rejection, I figured I’d recycle something I wrote in my blog when I was unemployed.   I found the two conundrums to be somewhat related.  Although with writing, there is always the chance to improve.
 
I am becoming very familiar with something I have dubbed as the ouch factor.    You saw the perfect job.  It was as if the stalked your resume, wrote the job for you and did everything short of contacting you for the position. You apply, get a call back, go for the interview and receive almost instantaneous positive feedback. Then a week goes by and you get “the call.” You were wonderful, amazing, the best thing since sliced bread, but unfortunately they found someone who had a plethora more experience. In the meantime, they will keep you in mind for anything that comes up in the future, because you really and truly were the cat’s meow. Feeling very satisfied with yourself, you ride the wave of sugary optimism, until IT happens. A week after your glowing let-me-down phone call, you see it: your job is back on the advertisement roller coaster.  And then you realize you got the “it’s not you, it’s us” routine in over the top fashion.

That first moment when you see that ad is the ouch factor. Within a span of ten seconds, you go through a myriad of emotions. First, you can’t believe it. You check the company and the language in the ad.  Yup, exactly the same.  Word for work.  Then confusion sets in.  Maybe there was some sort of mistake, mishap with the publishers, a cruel prank?  When those options don’t pan out, anger swoops in.  How could they pass up on someone like you (remember, they REALLY built you up).  You were amazing, wonderful, fabulous.   And then, comes the inevitable crash. It’s the realization that not only did you not get job, they didn’t think you were the greatest thing since sliced bread, but they were willing to start the process all over again because you were that bad of a candidate. It’s truly amazing, but all those emotions course through your body in one giant ball that can only be classified as a big “ouch!”

The ouch factor is really just the knee jerk reaction to rejection. Nothing more, nothing less. The only good thing with the ouch factor is that, like a bandage being ripped off a hairy arm, it comes in the form of a pointy arrow that shoots and then leaves.  So in the end, maybe it’s better that the rejection came with such a swift force. At least it’s better knowing.