Your Book Boyfriend: Know When You’ve Gone Too Far

mermaids

Denny S. BryceThere are rules to be followed in the world of fiction – television or books or film – one of the big rules is to know when your book/TV/film boyfriend obsession has gone beyond reason.

Now, I know nothing about this malady. I have never crossed the line. But some of my author friends and others have taken the concept of the book/fiction boyfriend too far. I may not be able to help them (too late), but some of you are only on the verge of toppling over the edge of the cliff. This post is for you.

Below are eight (8) signs that the crazy is in you, and you’d better watch out.

1. You write blogs where you deny you have a book boyfriend. If you do this, take a moment and think about it. (You may have a problem).

2. While listening to your audiobook and driving along 495, you suddenly pull over to curse out your book boyfriend’s wife because she is treating him badly. (You may have a problem).

3.  They (tv producers) make a TV show about your book boyfriend and you read EVERYTHING the actor portraying him (brilliantly, I may add) has ever said publicly, on Twitter, on FB, and you have a YouTube folder just for him…oh, too much information)…(You may have a problem).

4. Pinterest knows about your fictional boyfriend and fuels your madness with daily new photos of the actor who portrays your book boyfriend. (You may have a problem).

5. Your friend whose name you sometimes forget photoshops your image on a photo of a woman standing next to the actor who plays your book boyfriend, and you don’t care. It works for you. The photo doesn’t even look photoshopped. (You may have a problem).

5. You search the books you’ve read featuring your book boyfriend for his name and reread all of the passages where he says, I love you. (Sadly, this may represent more than just a problem).

6. You are planning a trip to the Highlands, which was never on your bucket list until 2014, when you first started reading the book where you found your book boyfriend. (This will cost a lot of money…you may have a problem).

7. You have given up other fiction boyfriends (sorry, Dean Winchester) because it’s too hard to juggle more than one man. (You may have a problem).

8. And finally, if you don’t believe you have problem…just ask somebody…:)…

Anything here remind you of someone? Posting here might be a good place to start healing:)…

 

37 thoughts on “Your Book Boyfriend: Know When You’ve Gone Too Far”

    1. So glad you’re taking my advice and starting to heal – by not admitting you aren’t one of those women with the Jamie/Sam problem (unlike me:)…

  2. Hahahahaha – I think this is my favorite post to ever grace the Waterworld Mermaid site!!! 😉

  3. Her name is Suzannika, and she’s more than a friend. She’s a sister wife. And may I add a #9 to your list? You feel your fictional lover’s pain so deeply, you’re ‘re unable to watch the episode on TV where he gets…hurt. You just can’t. (You welcome the problem).

    1. OMG! Cracking up, Suzannika Margaret! BTW, loved the photoshopped pic. Are you giving your daughter a break in school these days? lol

      1. I only interrupt her during class for VERY important reasons, such as photoshopping Denny’s face over the pic of some woman who has no business being with Sam.

    3. On a serious note, Erika, it was the most harrowing hour of TV I’ve ever seen and I loved every minute. However, the next episode on May 30 is supposed to surpass the last one – and I’m telling you, I’m freaking out!

      1. I don’t think I can handle seeing the last episode, Denny. And you should totally prepare me for May 30–are they going to hurt our man?

        1. We may have to chat…I’m strong-minded but after “Wentworth” they made me wobbly. And from everything I’ve read – the last episode is actually more insane (in terms of Jamie suffering) than Wentworth. You should watch Wentworth though. Sam Heughan is brilliant.

  4. You guys are a hoot! My book boyfriend at the moment is not based on my work- it’s Darynda Jone’s character, REYES. The times I think I’m entering the menopause hot-flash stage only happen when I’m reading her Grave series and he’s in the scene. 😉

    Fun blog, Denny!

    1. Kimberly has told me about the REYES love. I’m going to jump on board this summer – although I’m only on Book 4 in the Outlander series…

      1. So contentious. Here I was offering for the 3 of us to be sister wives, but if you insist on being scrappy about it…I might just have to post another pic just to prove which one of us is his woman.

  7. Love it! And, I don’t have a problem! But, speaking from experience, thou doth protest too much, my friend. Where are you traveling this summer?

  8. Hahaha hilarious! “This will cost a lot of money…you may have a problem.” Love this, Denny!

  10. Lol Lol Lol! I don’t think you have a problem, Denny. Not at all. Not even when I heard you *screaming* as you were watching an episode of your book boyfriend. By yourself. Drinking scotch. Never crossed my mind that you had a problem. Not once.

  14. Denny,
    You have a BIG problem. Just sayin’. The first step is always admitting it. And saying his name. JAMIE FRASER. JAMIE FRASER. JAMIE FRASER!
    I challenge you to do it here on Waterworld Mermaids. You’re in the company of those who love you. We will support you.
    With scotch.
    With life-size cutouts of Jamie.
    With photoshopped pics courtesy of Suzannika.
    Embrace the crazy in you! We already have.

  15. If you’d ever come over and watch the show, you’d have the SAME problem. You’ve read the books – you know what to expect. And where can I find a life-sized cut-out? I need it…of him smiling after 1.15. Lawrd have mercy.

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