Yes. I’ve got some pet peeves. Years ago, they may have merely been classified as annoyances, but today there are things that just bug the living hell out of me.
What have I done about my pet peeves? Well, I’ve thrown many of them into my writing! Don’t you?
Come on, admit it. Don’t you have things that you wish you could say or do, but you feel like you can’t? But, your characters can say and do anything they want! You can’t be held responsible for their actions. It’s fiction! Right?
So, if I write that one of my characters finds it annoying when someone dips their French fries in her ketchup, what’s wrong with that? Maybe those French fry dippers will stay the hell away from my ketchup and find their own…if they read my first book. 🙂
If I can rid the world of things hanging off rearview mirrors, that’s a campaign I can seriously get behind. I have a friend who admitted that she has tacky dice proudly swinging from her rearview mirror. (You know who you are, Kerri) Another friend has a dream catcher. Cute. Right? Wrong! The number one thing I hate is the crystal prism that practically blinds the people both in the front and back of that car. To all of you who feel the pressing urge to adorn your rearview mirror—Just. Say. No.
Do you secretly throw your pet peeves into books as your own personal therapy session free of charge? Do you give your hero or heroine your own annoyance of a particular pet peeve? Do you make the protagonist chew her hair or crack his knuckles? Maybe have someone say, “You know” after everything they say?
What are some of the things that drive you nuts? Do you identify with characters in your favorite book because they share the same likes or dislikes?
Fess up! What are the things you love to hate the most? I’ll go ahead and get things started. Let me know if I should include some more. Unfortunately I have tons.
I love this saying by George Carlin: “I don’t have pet peeves—I have major psychotic f***ing hatreds.”
I’m not that bad. Yet.
Kim’s Ten Top Pet Peeves
- You guessed it…dipping your food in my ketchup.
- Rearview mirror decorations…especially prisms. Hate those.
- Bumper stickers. Who cares what you think???
- Smart cars. Enough said.
- People who have to One Up others.
- Double negatives
- Twenty Questions at the gas pump (credit or debit/do you want a car wash?/gas card #?/receipt or no receipt? Wouldn’t it seriously be faster to just go into the gas station???)
- People who begin an explanation with, “…Again, I said…”
- Gum chompers–if I wanted to hang out with a cow, I’d visit the zoo.
- Self checkout lanes–shouldn’t the stores be paying me for MY time?
- People who can’t stop at 10 on lists. 🙂
- Texting while you’re with other people–RUDE!
Great post, Kim! I throw a whole bunch of my pet peeves into my writing. Just the other day I had my main character go off on an anti-smoking rant. Not preachy, but totally pointing out how much it makes you reek. Hmmm, other pet peeves? People who start off every sentence/question with “So.” So I went to the store today…, So it turns out that global warming is caused by…, etc. The only question that should start with that word is “So what?”
Lea,
I’m with you on the smoking thing! My parents smoked, and all through high school everyone assumed I smoked because my locker reeked of smoke. Not until I was in college and away from home did I realize to what extent….
Yucky yuck.
Too funny, Kim.
1. Driving too slow.
2. Not waiting in the intersection for traffic to clear so they can turn.
3. Lethargic customer service reps.
4. Those who believe that periods are optional.
5. WRITING IN ALL CAPS ALL THE TIME.
Only five or I’m afraid I won’t be able to stop myself. Also, you get double points for quoting Carlin. 🙂
Avery,
Even worse than the lethargic customer service reps are the ones who chomp on gum. Now, THOSE are a few of my favorite things. LOL. Are you noticing ALL MY CAPS? I hate that, too. If you want to shout at me, I challenge you to do it in person! That’s what I want to say to those people. Not that I’m all that intimidating at 5’2″, but I try. 🙂
First of all, I have STEELER fuzzy dice hanging on my rear view mirror. Where the Steelers are concerned, everything is okay.
Secondly, I have more pet peeves than I could possibly list. (Never really thought about putting them in a book but I’m totally going to do that now.) Here’s a short list:
1. EFFING WHISTLING – I hate whistling so much that it seriously makes me want to scratch all the skin off my body.
2. Drivers who cut you off and then drive slow.
3. Drivers who cut you off or do something stupid because they are on their cell phone. If you can’t do two things at once, don’t try. (Actually, I have a whole sublist for driving offenses.)
4. Colonial people
5. People who kick the back of my chair at a movie theater.
6. People who leave their cell phones on during work hours and I have to hear their really annoying ring tone all day long.
7. When you’re eating something and a person comes up and says, “Ew, that looks gross.”
Kerri,
I stand corrected on the fuzzy dice. Did not realize they were Black and Yellow, Black and Yellow…Steelers rock, so I’ll cut you some slack on that one.
I always get a kick out of your annoyance of colonial people. I guess you steer clear of writing books set in that time period. I’d love to see you in a little bonnet. Pretty please?
I think drivers of all sorts rank up there on everyone’s pet peeves. That’s been the one consistent thing. Lots of emotion while driving. That should be a new driving offense. DWUEI–Driving While Under Emotional Influence.
But Kerri Mermaid, what if I’ve got the moves like Jagger? How do you not appreciate Adam Levine’s whistling???
Ha, ha, Kerri. I like the last one.
Great post Kim! My nuber one pet peeve are voice activated help lines where you can’t bypass the auto sh*! by pressing “0”. And apparently “FU” is not a recognized answer…but it should be.
Carey,
I think FU should definitely be a recognized answer. Sometimes I call back and don’t touch anything until someone comes on. They are generally not happy campers at all. I think they realize in advance that if someone sat around waiting for an actual person, it isn’t going to go well for anyone. LOL.
I seriously feel like taking a valium before calling those lines.
I would have to agree with the voice activated help lines. Good one. Oh and seeing cars with all kinds of Eco Friendly bumper stickers and the person driving throws something out of the car–saw that the other day. Helllllooo!
Loni,
Or even better…when you see bumper stickers about saving the environment and it’s on a bumper of a big-ass SUV. That’s the best.
So…….theoretically, you all should not be able to tolerate me!!! Hahahahaha. I have several things dangling from my rear view mirror, my max driving speed is 45, been known to type in all caps but mostly just when I say nice things like I LOVE THIS POST SO MUCH…I like to add the word “right?” to many of my sentences, definitely have bumper stickers, can’t NOT whistle to a certain Maroon 5 song….looks like this character is goin’ in a book!
Carlene,
As long as you love MY post, I’m fine with you saying I LOVE THIS POST SO MUCH in all caps. LOL.
Mermaids are exempt from my pet peeve list, so adorn your rearview mirror proudly. And I don’t know what’s up with Kerri and the whistling…I think happy people annoy her. So sad. Really.
You seem like you’d be an awesome character in a book, and not because of any pet peeves. I love happy people who seem to enjoy life!
So funny, Kim. My pet peeve is when strangers invade your personal space, like putting their hands on your pregnant belly or giving you unsolicited advice. (Do you do that, Carlene?) I think I tried to put a pet peeve into a character once, but it didn’t work out too well. I just ended up getting extremely annoyed because I was thinking about the pet peeve!
Oh, I am SO with you! I also love when strangers if I know what “causes this” when they see me with my five children close in age. So annoying. Like I’m some backward hillbilly who doesn’t understand what contraception is. LOL.
How about I WANTED five kids????
There was a woman who asked my friend once at the playground, “Where did you get your daughter?” My friend was married to a Chinese man. How rude! She was clearly surprised at the rudeness. Where did you get her? Certainly not Cosco…
Oh P.H., you bet I’ve been a pregnant belly rubbing offender but NOT TO A STRANGER! Geesh, the nerve of some people 😉
Hi, Kim! I’m not a fan of self-serve checkouts either. Maybe it’s because I was a checkout chick in my teens. Anyway, shouldn’t we get a discount for serving ourselves at the supermarket?
One of my pet peeves is people who clip their fingernails on the train. Yes. I’ve witnessed this three times now. I don’t understand why some think trains are the right venue for grooming.
That’s hysterical, Vanessa!
Some people just don’t understand the basics of human existence. Who in the world would think it’s okay to clip fingernails on the train? Wow.
I love when people fight on the cell phone while walking around the store and swear and yell like nobody can hear them. I just want to walk up and say, “Excuse me. Clearly this relationship is not working out. Just move on.” But, I never have the guts to do that. Too afraid of getting my butt kicked. Partly because I’m 5’2″–well, almost. I’ve apparently lost more than a half of an inch. That’s a whole other post. LOL.
Hilarious post! I hadn’t though to put any particular pet peeves into my writing, but I’ll have to rethink that. Up to now, I’ve been intent on inserting a sly reference to almost everyone I can think of as I go along.
But pet peeves of my own? How about the colleague who invades my space with oh-so-humorous observations of my personal life while I’m on deadline? Or the woman who ignored the stop sign and turned left across my lane and cut me off WHILE ON THE PHONE? Or the drivers in the Bronx who ignore the law of “pedestrians first” at intersections?
For those of you are fed up and want revenge (however petty), I offer this website:
http://www.subservientchicken.com/pre_bk_skinned.swf
it will do exactly as you please, as long as you don’t say “FU.”
Love the sly references, too. You can completely get away with that. I like to combine a few annoying qualities of different people and lump them into one annoying person. Don’t you wish you could do that in real life?
Of course, I have plenty of annoying qualities myself, but I’m completely at peace with them. LOL
Great post Kim! I have tons of pet peeves and yes I include them in my writing. Here are a few:
1. Talking or texting while DRIVING!
2. Gum chompers
3. Movie talkers (you know the annoying person in front of or behind you who talks through the whole movie at the theater)
4. Slow drivers who park in the left lane
5. Self check out