That’s right. I didn’t do NaNo this year. The final days of last November brought on a sly, simmering uneasiness about my health. It was a feeling I couldn’t quite shake, but knew I ignored it at my own peril. Yes, nineteen years with the unpredictable and unforgiving disorder of MS have taught me to respect my intuition – if you’ve got the shakes, Susan, for God’s sake slow down. And, if you know me, I’m an all-in or a who-cares kind of girl, and I felt it unwise to subject myself to another month of NaNo stress. Writing is meant to be fun. Why spoil it with another trip to physical therapy?
Instead, I embarked on an entirely different type of insanity. One where *I* was making the rules (sort of). In fact, I have been on a writing hiatus this month in order to preserve my sanity (what little I have). And do you know what? It sucks.
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There are stories in my treasure chest that refuse to be completed, for one reason or another. One, LAKE EFFECT, has bedeviled me for several years. Gerald, the father, has never decided if he will be dead (enabling his rambling daughter to sell the house and move on) or alive (chaining her to a life of servitude, shuffling between the old house and the nursing home)?
Worse, what of my two lovers? Nicole is a devoted girlfriend, with an overseas boyfriend. She just doesn’t know he has wandering eyes. Sam is being pursued by a girlfriend-wanna-be in relentless pursuit of his favors. I’ve loved writing Desmond’s and Tara’s scenes – as the unfortunate foils for my hero and heroines, they’re both such worthless material as potential mates and so completely clueless.
Occasionally I struggle with midnight “monkey mind” as I wrestle again with the frustration of seeing this story complete and finding readers. There are other stories I’m writing, or…
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